And You Thought It Was Safe(?)


Catwoman (2004)

Special thanks to my Three Graces: Action, Queen Jane (not-so-approximately) and Tails for putting up with all my crap over the years, including Beta versions of this review.


4 Comments so far
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“There are 3 good things in it: Halle Berry’s? face, Halle Berry’s body, and Halle Berry’s costumes. Those are first rate. Everything else in this movie is unbelievably bad.” – Roger Ebert.

Comment by Filip Önell

And with all due respect to Roger, I’m throwing the “bullshit” flag on that one, too. Her face – especially her googley eyed, “OMG! I’m, like, back from the dead” face – is one of the film’s major stumbling blocks, and even back in ’04 I was never so enamored with it to the point where it alone could draw me in with the Power of Hotness. Her body has the same problem. As aesthetically please as it is (and it is) I can’t really enjoy myself after the film pours her into what has to be the slinkiest, most exploitative superhero costume this side of…well, the Black Scorpion’s. By the night club scene, Catwoman‘s rampant sexual inuendo becomes sexual out-uendo and I start to feel dirty, like I’m watching a Humiliation Porno. Granted, as a character, Catwoman’s no stranger to titillating outfits…but the film didn’t go with any of those. Oh, no. Given the chance, they designed an all-new, even-more-impractical costume, aimed straight at the fetishizers and all the no-account, turned-our-brains-off-a-the-door, who-cares-it’s-“just”-a-comic-book-movie scrubs who’d waste $20 on the chance to stare at Halle Berry for two hours and build up their Fantasy Fuel. Even back in ’04 I could do that for free and all I had to do was watch Bullworth again.

Comment by David DeMoss

Entertaining review and podcast. Normally I prefer to read my reviews (under some sort of delusion that reading isn’t goofing off but watching a video is) but I’ve enjoyed your writing so I figured I’d give your ‘cast a try. Now I’m looking forward to your next one.

Comment by David Lee Ingersoll

Thank you. And no worries: I labored under the same delusion for quite some time, ignoring the fact that whole packs of talented individuals have seemingly dedicated themselves to experimenting with the long-form video review as a medium for both critique and comedy. After all, reading counts as “research,” am I right?

Comment by David DeMoss




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