And You Thought It Was Safe(?)


Die Another Day (2002)

Our review of the twentieth James Bond movie. God help us all.

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The World Is Not Enough (1999)

Our review of the nineteenth James Bond film, and the beginning, after a temporary flirtation with being awesome, of the franchise’s downward slide back into vacuous, bandwagon-jumping  irrelevancy.



Tomorrow Never Dies (1997)

Our review of the eighteenth James Bond movie. May the ghost of Cubby Broccoli watch over us as the Brosnan Age continues.



GoldenEye (1995)

Die Another Day (2002)
This is where I abandoned all hope.

Don’t know about you, but this is where I abandoned all hope.

Bond is, in many ways, every “civilized” government’s wet dream: a nominal superman, possessed of  knowledge, skill-sets, and technologies far beyond we mere mortals…with no attachment to humanity.

Die Another Day finds the Fifth Bond (Pierce Brosnan) visibly aged since his previous appearance on the world stage and sent to assassinate one Colonel Moon (Will Yun Lee) of the North Korean Army. Moon’s your usual evil hypocrite, having used his American education to get in good with international Conflict Diamond smugglers. As he tells Bond “I studied at Oxford and Harvard: majored in Western hypocrisy,” and it’s nice to see a fellow History Major on screen, even if only as a Bond Villain. So far, so good, but things will get bad very quickly. Continue reading