And You Thought It Was Safe(?)


Halloween: Resurrection (2002)

How could I not review Halloween on Halloween? And how could a movie this predictable hurt so much?

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Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998)

Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)

Jason X (2002)

Silent Night Deadly Night (1984)

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Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare (1991)

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Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989)
The best ideas in this film? Stealing shots from the original.

The best ideas in this film? Stealing shots from the original.

These Slasher sequels are supposed to be simple. Trot out a brace of clay pigeons, watch them all die one by one, tack on some stupid cliffhanger, and you’re all good to go. It seems impossible to screw that up, but by God, Mustapha Akkad found a way. Several, in fact.

The first, Halloween 4, was a complete waste of its own potential, meant to compete with the other Big Names in this sub-genre by copying all their worst eccentricities. By 1989, the Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elm Street films had long-since surpassed the original Halloween in the popular imagination. They (rightly or not…mostly not) were synonymous with American horror movies of the late-80s, leaving their mutual progenitor in the box office dust.

Akkad  couldn’t allow that. Nor could he allow Halloween 5 to pick up where the last left off. Sure, The Revenge begins with a re-staging of  The Return‘s final moments, but that somehow makes it worse. Unlike the mouth-breathing audiences Akkad obviously targeted, I actually remember the end of Halloween 4. I hoped it signaled a spark of creativity finally flaring up within this franchise. Nice of Halloween 5 to crush that right out of the gate. Continue reading